Friday, June 18News That Matters

Entertainment

It’s My Cake Day, So Here’s My Favorite Joke: A Naïve Young Man Walks Into A Lesbian Bar

It’s My Cake Day, So Here’s My Favorite Joke: A Naïve Young Man Walks Into A Lesbian Bar

Entertainment
A Naïve Young Man Walks Into A Lesbian Bar He buys the first beautiful woman he sees a drink and begins to try to chat her up. Lesbian: "Look, I appreciate your trying, but I'm a lesbian." Naïve Young Man: "What's a lesbian?" Lesbian: "See that woman over there at the other side of the bar? I'd like to go over there, kiss her, seduce her, and take her home with me to have sex with her all night long." Naïve Young Man: Looks surprised, then drops his head and starts weeping. Lesbian: "What's wrong? Did I hurt your feelings?" Naïve Young Man: "No, but I think I might be a lesbian too!" submitted by /u/phantomerick [link] [comments]
I work for a small restaurant and the owner comes in to help the server as a manager and tried to take tips. Should I be upset?

I work for a small restaurant and the owner comes in to help the server as a manager and tried to take tips. Should I be upset?

Entertainment
When I came in I had a horrible migraine so my manager said he would take the first table for me and also took our first takeout order. He ended up keeping the tips for both and it felt super strange because I never had a manager to do that. Sundays are also ridiculously slow so I was really hoping I could hit a $100. I ended up saying something and he flipped out on me in front of one of my coworkers. He was screaming at me saying he did me a favor for giving me a job and that he does so much for me that I basically owe him. It was $30. He told me I make so much on the weekends and that he makes nothing rn and that I was being selfish for trying to keep a table he did work for and he never asks for a tipout even though he deserves one for all the work he does. I left feeling so embarrasse...
The Saga of Creepy Old Dude, part 1 of infinity probably.

The Saga of Creepy Old Dude, part 1 of infinity probably.

Entertainment
I am so sorry this will be so long, and in multiple parts LMFAO I used to be a server at a casino, but my job closed in March so I have been bartender and (sometimes) server at this pub since July. It's been open for like 30+ years and a lot of regulars here have been coming here forever, and 90% of them are great and lovely. This dude is not one of them. I will call him T. T comes in basically every single day, sometimes multiple times a day. He also stops by our liquor store at like 8-9am before the pub opens, or he goes to other pubs to drink before coming here. He always gets drunk here, and every time he gets drunk he gets weird and fucking creepy. I absolutely loathe when he sits at my bar because then I have to interact with him. I work nights mostly, so when I come in at 4:45pm...
A joke about cake for my cake day

A joke about cake for my cake day

Entertainment
Little Johhny is walking around and peaks in his parents room, catching them having sex so he asks, “What are you guys doing?” and they reply “Nothing, nothing! we’re just uh, making cake” and they send him away. So he continues walking around and he hears some strange noises coming from his brothers room so he walks in and catches his brother and his brothers girlfriend having sex and then asks him “What are you guys doing?” and his brother yells “Get out! were making cake!” So Johnny leaves and goes to his room. The next day the whole family is at the dinner table and Little Johnny turns to his sister and says “So, you and your boyfriend were making cake last night huh!” and she replies “OMG! Yes ,it was so tasty." Johnny replied "Nah. It wasnt" Sister:"How do you...
My favourite joke, Girls night out

My favourite joke, Girls night out

Entertainment
2 girls go out on a girls night out. They do everything as normal party, drink ect... After lots of heavy drinking the girls head on home in the early hours of the morning. Almost home both of the girls need to pee. Not wanting to go in the street the girl go into the grave yard that's near by. The 1st girl goes, after realising she has nothing to wipe with she takes off her panties and wipes herself. The 2nd girl goes but because she's not wearing an panties she grabs a wreath off of a near by grave and wipes herself with it and both head home. The next morning 1 husband calls the other and say "Thats it! No more girls nights out! My wife came home without any panties on!" The other husband says "you think that's bad! My wife came home with a card in her ski...